Fathers Rights

When a father doesn’t have custody of his children, he may have a difficult time of it when holidays roll around. He may not have custody because of a divorce or a breakup with the mother. If a holiday is not specifically spelled out in some kind of court order, then dad generally won’t get to see his kids. Even if it IS in a court order - well, mom has some bogus excuse why the kids should spend the holidays with her. And what is really happening is that the children are not seeing their relatives on dad’s side of the family.

Holidays are when families get together. Oh sure, Dad may get the kids every weekend. But getting the family together on a weekend is much harder than on a holiday. And forget trying to do this on one of those midweek visits! Trying to co-ordinate seeing relatives around the rush of the visit: pick the child up, drive to dad’s house, eat, do homework, drive back, and then the inevitable confrontation with mother. It’s pretty impossible to keep the children in touch with anyone but Dad on these midweeks.

But holidays! Aaaaah! No school for the children. Most people have off from work. Many people plan to travel and get together. Wouldn’t it be WONDERFUL to have the relatives - aunts, uncles, cousins - spend this happy time with your kids? Just you and them. No hassles with mom or her family or her new boyfriend’s or new husband’s family. There’s always the looking at the clock, counting down until it’s time-to-take-back. But for those brief hours or days, your children get to know a whole new host of relatives who love them.

Sadly, too many fathers are denied holiday time with their children. Sometimes, they are just flat out denied contact with their kids. Or Mom says HER family has a “get together” for that particular holiday. Or “sudden plans” come up. Whatever it is - Dad and the relatives don’t get to see the kids for a holiday. That’s wrong. And it’s harmful.

What can you do about it? Go to Court.

1. Some states have a specific holiday parenting time schedule. It is a MYTH that if Dad doesn’t request a holiday, that he waives visitation for that holiday! If you are denied a holiday - or you are told that the kids won’t be available - you need to DEMAND your rights, and their rights, to this time. This is a PETITION TO ENFORCE PARENTING TIME.

2. Many states also say that parenting time trumps EVERYTHING. Family get-togethers, family traditions, even religious celebrations - EVERYTHING. So if your ex claims that any of these mean you don’t get the childern for a holiday - file a PETITION FOR CONTEMPT and a PETITION FOR INJUNCTION, to get your UNINTERRUPTED time with your kids.

3. Many states have laws that say that Dad can NOT be denied visitation if he is regularly paying child support. And since so many courts are now requiring child support to come straight out of paychecks, YOU probably are paying your support regularly. If your ex says flat out you won’t get time for a particular holiday, file a PETITION FOR INJUNCTION to force visitation.

4. If you are celebrating the holidays of your religion (as opposed to mother’s religion), then your children need to be aware of your faith and practices. If she denies you this time, again, file a petition with the Court. The judge may not even be aware there is a religious difference that is causing turmoil.

These are YOUR kids, and you don’t get a second shot at raising them.

Erik Carter has been a practicing trial attorney for over 15 years. Currently he is exclusively practicing family law, and maintains and develops The Father’s Rights Library, which is devoted to educating Fathers on effective litigation strategies for court hearings, mediations, and negotiations. Currently featuring “Aggressive PLEADINGS For The Non-Custodial Father” and “Aggressive DISCOVERY For The Non-Custodial Father” at a special discount price. He also runs STRESS JUDO, a program to train you to turn stress into OPPORTUNITIES

Hi Fathers.  And Merry Christmas! But it’s September, you say.  Why wish you a Merry Christmas now?  Because if you’ve problems in the past exercising your father’s rights to see your kids for Christmas, then NOW is the time to think about fixing it THIS time. Here are 6 steps to make sure that happens.

 

See, I’ve been a lawyer for 15 years.  I’ve practiced in several states.  And one thing I have seen is this: if you’ve had difficulty getting Christmas visitation with your kids in the past – you’ll have it again this year.  So start NOW, laying the ground work to turn that around once and for all.

 

1. Read your Order and figure out specifically what dates your parenting time begins and ends.

2.  Send her a letter (certified mail), specifying the dates.  Include this language: “If you disagree with this interpretation of the Order, respond to me in writing by <give her a specific date to respond>.  If you do not respond, then you agree that this interpretation of the Order is correct and I shall make plans accordingly.”

3. If she does not respond, then on <specific date to respond>, send her another letter (certified mail), stating: “You did not object in writing to my letter of <date of last letter>.  Therefore, you agree that this interpretation of the Order is correct and I shall make plans accordingly.”

4.  If she does respond, look at her objection.  She cannot object that the kids don’t want to see you; that you have never visited them in the past; or that they have plans with her new boyfriend or husband.

5.  If you decide her objection is worthless, send her a letter (certified mail), stating: “Your objections are not correct.  You have not stated a legitimate objection to my letter of <date of last letter>.  Therefore, you agree that this interpretation of the Order is correct and I shall make plans accordingly.”

6.  if her objections are valid, then use her objections to come up with the correct dates, and repeat the process.

 

Courts generally will not treat problems with holiday visitation as an emergency, unless you can show that she is reneging on an agreement or violating a court order about the holiday.  The above establishes that:

1. she agree with your interpretation;
2. you made plans based on her agreement;
3. her reversal is a sudden and unforeseen event requiring immediate action to prevent harm (that’s the definition of an emergency).

So, start NOW to get your Christmas with your kids.  Are we guaranteeing this will work?  No.  We don’t know you, your background ,your judges or even your state’s laws.  But this method will lay the groundwork for you to go to court and set forth your best case FOR getting the time.  And that’s what this blog is all about.

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
The FATHER’S RIGHT LIBRARY was written by Rick Carter, a 15+ year veteran of family law courts in several states.   The LIBRARY was developed to educate you on your rights as a father and also to help you develop the most aggressive strategies for family law court.  Because for too many judges, parental rights means “whatever mom wants.”  Reclaim your father’s rights.

I really and truly appreciate each person who visits this blog.  I hope that it has helped you out in some fashion.  And I want to make this blog really work for you and your family.

Which leads me to my question…

But first: the purpose of this blog is, first and foremost, to sell the FATHER’S RIGHTS Library.  The reason that these manuals should be sold is that there are so few resources for fathers who are stuck in family court.  There are excellent websites and books available, many from law firms that focus on representing men in court.  I have worked for some of these firms, and with others on cases, and I encourage you to seek out their resources and what they can offer.

There are organizations that are trying to develop “father’s rights” as a political movement, and I applaud them.  I don’t I agree with each and every one, but I support their efforts to make the political and legal system aware of what fathers go through in family law court.

The FATHER’S RIGHTS Library is designed and written to help you and your lawyer work together to achieve tangible results in court.  It is not ”self-help” manuals.  It is not ”second guessing your lawyer” manuals.  Each manual is a collection of the most agressive techniques for that topic, so you and your lawyer can stop talking to your ex and start fighting for your kids.

So here is my question for you.  I am about to start on Volume 3 of the Library.  Volume 1 is “Aggressive Pleadings.”  Volume 2 is “Aggressive Discovery.”  What should Volume 3 be?
I had originally planned it to be “Aggressive Custody Litigation.”
The other possibilities are “Aggressive Parenting Time” (techniques to get as much time as possible with your children) and “Aggressive Mental Health” (how to address your ex’s mental health issues and how to respond to accusations about yours).

Please leave a comment on this blog as to which of the you would like to see next.  Whichever one you pick, there WILL be a chapter on “parental alienation.”  I am seeing more and more fathers tell me how distant their children have become, which has to be the most heart breaking result in the world.

So leave a comment as to which one you prefer.
Thank you, and God bless you and your children.
Rick Carter

So everyone’s focused on health car, car sales, and getting the Supreme Court minority-correct.  But who is pushing for fathers who can’t see their kids?  Where is the advocacy group to LOWER child support?  Where are the children’s advocates who ENCOURAGE mothers to let visitation occur?

There isn’t any.  Oh, sure, there are some brave souls who are bringing “attention” to the problem.  But there is no organized funded group pushing fathers’ agendas like other groups have.

Because no one will recognize that the right of a father to raise his children - even after a divorce or breeakup - is the most important and fundamental human right of all.

What can you do about it?  Don’t wait!  Get the Father’s Rights Library now!  These manuals are written by a divorce lawyer representing fathers in court, to help you and your lawyer be more effective in family law court.  Because right now - that’s all you’ve got.

Summer is almost over.  For many divorced or separated fathers, it’s been an enjoyable time with their children.  Maybe you got them for a few weeks for vacation.  Maybe you got them for half the summer.  But for many fathers, it’s another summer of parental alienation, of being denied their father’s visitation rights. And their children’s love.

And now school is coming.  Another year of not going to parent-teacher conferences. Of missing sporting events, choir concerts, and club activities. Of not knowing if your child has A’s or ADHD.  Another year of simply not seeing your children.

Make this year different.  NOW is the time to be talking with your lawyer about enforcing your father’s visitation rights for the school year.  NOW is the time to be getting your copy of the FATHER’S RIGHTS LIBRARY.  Click these links (or right here) for more information.

There is a huge debate right now over whether people of the same sex should have the same right to marry as people of opposite sexes.  People on both sides of the debate say that it involves the “definition of marriage.”  But whatever happened to the definition of FAMILY??

Too often, when parents split up - either through divorce or just ending a relationship - the mother takes the attitude of “I divorced you, the kids divorced you.”  Father’s parenting time becomes an after-thought, not the priority it deserves.  Dad’s right to have input into how his children are raised, decisions about their education and health, and his moral and experiential guidance are given no respect. Because, according to these mothers - and to the judges who preside over these cases, and the lawyers who argue them, and the social workers and counselors who stick their noses in - this just is not a family anymore.

(In the interest of fairness, I must mention that there are many split-families that actually do work.  Kudois to you and you are not the focus of this post.)

But gay marriage can get big donors and big organizations to spend lots of money lobbying.  It can be pitched as a human rights issue or a breakdown of society issue.  You can have little sound bites of celebrities for and against the issue.

But what big money organization is going to lobby for fathers?  Who thinks fathers have “human rights” - especially when the current political climate is “it takes a village (and specifically NOT a father) to raise a child”?  What celebrity is going to speak out on the heartbreak of getting screwed in court (when they can afford the $600 per hour lawyers to make sure it doesn’t happen to THEM)????

Sorry Dads.  You are on your own.  It’s just and your lawyer and the court you happen to be in.

So how can you even the playing field?

The FATHER’S RIGHTS Library, written by a 15+ year experienced trial attorney.
These manuals, written in plain English, are designed and written to pick the MOST AGGRESSIVE pleadings and discovery mechanisms, so that you - DAD - have a fighting chance in court.
Vol. I is Aggressive Pleadings. 6 pleadings specially selected to enforce parenting time, protect your kids from Mom’s new boyfriend or husband, and hold mother accountable when she violates court orders.
Vol. II is Aggressive Discovery.  Forcing your ex to TELL THE TRUTH and to actually PROVE her accusations can be the thing that turns the case around.  Wouldn’t it nice to actually see her paycheck or her checks for “daycare” to her mother or her best friend?  When she says you have “anger issues” or a “drinking problem,” wouldn’t it refreshing (and less stressful) for her to have the burden of proving this, instead of you always being on the defensive?

For summer, The FATHER’S RIGHT Library is a special discounted price.  Get it now, before your next appointment with your lawyer.  Use it to develop a specific strrategy that not only improves your chances of succes in court, but could substantiually lower your attorney’s fees!

Sarah Palin, the Republican vice-presidential candidate in the last election, should have been a pretty good advocate for Fathers.  After all, her husband was a devoted family man.  She believes strongly in family values. Her own daughter was unwed and pregnant, and she had to defend the father to the attacks of the Democrats and the media.  So what happens when politics meets reality?  Father’s right goes out the door.
According to several news stories, Palin’s daughter Bristol gave birth, but did not marry the father, Levi Johnston.  So when Mr. Johnston asks requests things like seeing his child - being alone with his child - not having the “in-laws” hover over him as he tries to bond with his son.
This is the time when chidlren bond with their parents.  Now, while he is an infant, is when young Tripp will identify his father.  Interfering with this seems to be parental alienation, doesn’t it?  Aw, but that doesn’t matter.  Boy broke up with my daughter - he doesn’t get to see his son.  Makes sense, doesn’t it? NOT!
Father’s rights? Yeah, that stuff’s okay for the campaign trial, but NOT IN MY HOUSE, is what Governor Palin seems to be saying.
So much for a political solution.
Mr.Johnston - and fathers in similar situations - can use The FATHER’S RIGHTS Library to enforce their rights in court.  Special discounted offer: the next 500 (or so, because some fathers have taken action) fathers get it for an unbelievable price.
Check out The FATHER’S RIGHTS Library.  And stop relying on politicians to raise your kids or fix your ex.

Leave your comments below and let’s get a discussion going on.  What do you suggest for Mr. Johnston? What did you do that was successful?